How to Support a Colleague

As legal professionals, we are trained to approach a problem with an analytical mind, applying the law to the facts we are presented to solve our client’s problem. Yet how do we support a colleague who comes to us struggling with their mental health? Can we use the same skills?

In typical lawyer fashion I am going to say that it depends. Some skills that we develop as legal professionals can be key. We are trained to listen to a narrative and issue spot. Listening is the most important thing you can do for a colleague in need. So often, those who might be struggling might just need to be heard. Beyond that, identifying the issues they are struggling with can help.

However, unlike when a client comes to us, someone living with a mental health condition might not necessarily want you to solve it. And you definitely shouldn’t feel like you need to solve the problem. Like we said, sometimes they just want to be heard. In other cases they might just want resources.

Whatever they need it is normal to feel like you aren’t prepared for it. Yet like we said, your ability to listen is so often the most important thing you can provide. It is important to remember not to react or judge to what you are hearing from a colleague, which shouldn’t be a stretch since so many of us already use that approach with clients.

Sometimes they might also need you to just be there. Sometimes being there means checking in on them. Other times it might look like supporting them by driving them to a therapy session or a support group or an AA meeting. Other times it might just be reassuring them that you won’t leave them when they share the struggles they are going through.

We’ve also heard from legal professionals who feel slightly hurt that a colleague didn’t feel they could open up earlier in their mental health journey. Yet divulging a mental health diagnosis, or struggle of any kind is a deeply personal thing. It doesn’t mean they don’t trust you, but merely that they are still working through who to share their experience with.

Lastly, like we said, you don’t need to know how to solve it. You can refer them to outside resources, like your state’s Legal Assistance Program (LAP), an Employee Assistance Program (EAP), or a non-profit program through their local NAMI, the DBSA, The LegalMind Society, or any other resource that you might know of. Whatever you or your colleague are dealing with, there are those out there who will help you deal with it in your own way. After all, no matter what we’re going through, none of us should have to go through it alone.

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